Happy Black History Month!! Today We Salute… My Big Long Black Chocolate Stereotype

Most things that happen to Black people are based on fears about what people have heard about us.  We are violent, emotional, uneducated, to name a few.  Many are hurtful and have damaged us as a community; people in our community have been killed based on the fears developed from misconceptions.  We have been kept out of institutions of higher learning and locked out of neighborhoods because of misguided beliefs.

Then there is that one ain’t one brotha complaining about, talk about how we all have rhythm and we show you our cousin that couldn’t keep the beat if you put a gun to his momma’s head and said you would blow it off if he pulled a Johnny Gill and clapped a half a second before or after everyone else.  Tell us we all are good at basketball and we will introduce you to our brother that gets picked after the Asian kid for a pick-up game (that’s how Jeremy Lin got so good).  Tell us we all like chicken and we show you our vegetarian cousin with the dread locks that eats organic foods and is skeptical about even eating tofu as a source of protein.  Tell us we all have big …. And we smile and say ‘well… heh… heh… heh’ (That’s me laughing).

So today on this day in Black History Month we thank you for the stereotype we ain’t marched against.  We hold on to this stereotype and thank you for sharing with everyone.  It helps that the only one’s of ours you have ever seen was the 6’7” basketball player your school recruited that walked around the locker room with his towel over his shoulder after he got out the shower.  If you have seen a little one on a brotha, what are you going to say?  You will sound like you spend your time at your gym hanging out by the lockers… looking to see if the myth of the Black man is true.  Freakin’ perv!

I don’t know if curiosity really killed the cat, but it did get it laid.  When a brotha gets to college he can smell the fascination from across the cafeteria.  You hinted at it so much, that Becky the Farm Girl, that has only seen Black people on television before getting to the University of We Here Too, wonders about it for months maybe even a couple of years that by the time her junior year rolls around she has the numbers for every football player that wears his hair in dreds or braids in her iPhone.  Then before you know it, you have a young lady that is going way too far out of her way to disappoint her daddy, heh… heh… heh…

Call us every ignorant thing you can come up with, every name you dream of, you put a stereotype on us that by the time it comes to prove if we measure up to it… who cares if we don’t we’re both here now and the lights are off.  Talk about us not having the tools, you then have to get into a conversation of why you were with us to begin with.  There is an entire division in the porn industry dedicated to the myth of the Black man. I can hear frat boys looking at those sites screaming “COME ON!!! THEY ALL CAN’T BE THAT BIG!” heh… heh… heh…

Black men could scream about a lot of things, we could scream every moment of our waking life.  No role models, poor prospects for a job, limited opportunities, if it wasn’t this big cock you say we have we really would be pissed.  Ever wonder why a trust fund kid says something to a brotha and the brotha doesn’t pop him upside his head?  Outside of police coming faster than a 22-year-old virgin, we generally appreciate this one stereotype.  The next time that brotha sees the guy, that he should have crushed, he almost feels obligated to thank him.  All the stereotypes he hurled about Black guys made his girlfriend slip the brotha her number with a message beneath it “I just wanna know if it’s true”.

Happy Black History Month to the stereotype we like!  It is nice to walk around with a mythical being tucked away beneath your saggin’ jeans.  I hate to cut this short, not something us Black guys usually do.  Let me hurry up and get out of here…  About to head over to a Black History Month celebration in honor of the movie Mandingo on campus, I need to shower, throw on some clothes, and toss my dick over my shoulder before I head out.  Heh… heh… heh…

Happy Black History Month!! In Memorium

As we approach the end of Black History Month we need to take time to pay tribute to and take a moment of silence for those no longer around.

Philadelphia soul man the late great Harold Melvin

West Coast Hip Hop pioneer DJ Yella

All time great football player Terrell Owens

Former Republican candidate for President of the United States Herman Cain

Herman Cain’s hoes

Tiger Woods inside a winner’s circle

The careers of actors after starring in Tyler Perry movies

Mya… after she turned 30

Big Tigger, A.J and Free

The NBA Slam Dunk competition

Jesse Jackson’s integrity

Self respect and Pride

Leroy from “The Last Dragon”

Black on Black love

Job opportunities for people with names ending in –niqua

Positive role models

Your pops!

Pelle Pelle gear

Juan Williams at Republican debates

The Old Spice guy

Money that is suppose to go to your church building fund

African American families on major network television

Steve Harvey’s hair, wigs, and hats

Accepting collect calls from nigga’s in the joint

Writing letter’s to nigga’s locked up in the joint

The careers of everyone in Destiny’s Child not named Beyonce

We take a moment of silence for all of you… MOMENT OVER!

Happy Black History Month!!! Today We Salute… Jeremy Lin (yes he is everywhere)

We are gonna get it lin today!  Not ‘in’, Lin… as in Jeremy Lin.  Yes Jeremy Lin is everywhere; he has even invaded Black History Month celebrations.  Sure he has obviously spent a lot of time with brothas, next time you see him being interviewed, close your eyes for a few seconds… sounds like he is from your local projects.  One chick thinks he is Black:

4.2 GPA coming out of high school raised in Palo Alto, California, Harvard educated… Asian!  This dude sounds more like your next boss, not like the franchise altering point guard the Knicks have been looking for since Earl “the Pearl” Monroe’s knees gave him the finger way back in 1980.

We celebrate Jeremy Lin because he did what rap music couldn’t do, he did what Wesley Snipes’ action films could not do, Kobe tried his best to do… he is making Asian kids put random B.S. in front of their education.  We miscalculated; we got our Latino brother’s and Latina sisters rolling real hard with us in the hood.  If you are from an island living in Florida or New York City, you live near us and face the same issues we do.  Thanks to N.W.A. we were able to get White kids to start calling each other nigga and that was before Eminem.  We could not figure out how to get Asian kids to start lowering their standards.  We sent Michael Jackson over there to get them to lower their standards, they put on the ‘zipper’ jacket and the one glove learned how to moon walk but that was as far as they were willing to go.

We thought hip-hop had a chance, when we realized there was a fondness of early 90’s rap music we sent A Tribe Called Quest over on so many tours that they ended up picking up on styles of Asian cultures.  Not what we wanted, that was supposed to work in the other direction.  We even stepped up our hip-hop attack on Asia, let’s go harder!  We sent 50 Cent over on a media blitz that had not been seen since the Clinton administration tried to do ‘damage control’ after an unwashed blue dress was shown to a reporter.  Fiddy, as Jeremy Lin likes to call him, became a promotional darling in Asian countries making so much cash over there he may have paid more in taxes to Japan and China from 2004-2007 than he did to the US.  Damn they are slick!  We sent our secret weapon over there and he ended up working for them.

All of sudden Kobe Bryant began to appear as a cultural phenomenon and we were realized “basketball is our way in, we missed our chance with Jordan let’s seize the Kobe moment”!  We were even caught by surprise with Kobe, yeah he was known we had no idea that China was crazy about Kobe Bean.  Chinese citizens flooded USA Basketball games chanting “KOBE, KOBE, KOBE”… yes this is our chance no Black man has gotten this much love from another race since pre-murder OJ and Kobe had possibly raped a White woman (allegedly… allegedly!  I want to make that point clear, after his wife ran off with half his cash and all his houses; he may be in suing mood.  IDIOT ALWAYS MAKE HER SIGN THE PRENUPTUAL, I DON’T CARE HOW MUCH YOU LOVE HER!!!).  We were half right, right sport… wrong guy.

I hear what you are saying, yes there was Yao Ming but his work was to influence us.  His check went directly to the Chinese government, and then to him, he knew where his bread was buttered.  He made the Olympics in China possible he was worth hundreds of millions to the Republic of China.  We still did not see how to find our way into Asian cultures.  We tried, Beyonce didn’t work, Obama damn sure ain’t work for us over there… Michael Jackson died before we could roll him out there again for another try.

Then on February 4, 2012, at the beginning of Black History Month ironically, are secret weapon revealed himself to us.  Dropping 25 points and 7 dimes on the Nets, he then went out and ran through a few more teams until he finally hung 38 points on Kobe Bean proving he was the ‘chosen one’ and fittingly killing Kobe’s hopes of Asian dominance.  We had the guy we needed to make Asian people everywhere put down the books and pick up something that will surround them with some ignorance finally.

Jeremy Lin has made hanging out with brotha’s look cool.  Jeremy Lin hit the winning 3-pointer against the Toronto Raptors and the Knicks bench exploded.  The last time you saw that many brotha’s celebrating with an Asian kid was win Jin was killing it on 106 and Park and announced he signed with the Ruff Ryders (you thought I was gonna say something about a math competition, didn’t you?  You racist bastard!).  Now Asian kids are embracing their blackness and things brotha’s do.  Think I am making this up?  I work at a Museum in Chicago, today every Asian kid I saw in the place had on a basketball jersey, any basketball jersey… that would have been enough but they all gave me that ‘whassup’ head nod too!  It’s on!  Of course this is not about the entire Asian community, just the women.

Once all Asians see blackness as cool, Asian women may start dating a brotha, then another brotha.  Seriously, the only known Asian women to marry a Black man are the one’s ready to get of Korea in the 50’s and Dave Chappelle’s wife.  THANK YOU JEREMY LIN!!!!  You have achieved something no Black man has ever been able to do and I am not just talking about effectively run Mike D’Antoni’s offense (outside of you, only Steve Nash has been able to pull off the pick & roll properly for him).  Happy Black History Month to you and US!!!!

Happy Black History Month!!! Today We Salute… The Hater

Today we salute the most controversial person of all the people we will honor in Black History Month… The Hater.  People say the best way to deal with the Hater is to ignore them, but Haters are not to be ignored, they refuse to be ignored, they will not let you ignore them, and you should not ignore them.  The Hater is confirmation that what you are doing is impressive.  So keep doing it!  Remember when you were good at baseball and everyone told you how well you were doing?  What happened?  You didn’t want to play baseball the next year, instead you learned how to smoke weed with your friends without getting caught.  Remember when your teacher told that you were good at Biology and that you should think about being a doctor?  Now you are pulling double-shifts at Wendy’s trying to keep a roof over your head and looking at those ‘you can still get a degree’ commercials they show during Judge Judy in the afternoon, like you still have hope.

You need the Hater; there was that time your brother told you that you would never beat him.  Within a year you were kicking his ass up and down the block, he started locking his door at night out of fear that you would walk in at 3 in the morning and resume the ass whupping.  Think about the time your friends said you couldn’t dance and laughed at you for hours, then days, then weeks about it.  That became a running joke on the block, so much so you stopped hanging out and stood in front of your TV watching Rap City and 106th and Park until you learned how to do the Bankhead Bounce, the Harlem Shake… the Roger Rabbit.  By the time the Spring Dance rolled up, you were killing it on the dance floor (if you did learn the Roger Rabbit, you were hurting the ankles of the person dancing behind you), man you were coming in 2nd and 3rd place at lunch hour dance competitions!  How about that time your ex told you that you would never amount to shit?  Well, the jury is still out on that one, but you are still trying to prove them wrong!  See, praise does nothing for you but a Hater can turn your whack ass into a star.

You think Barack Obama always wanted to be president?  Hell no, that brother wanted to be Dr. J, but you try being the only Black dude walking around a private high school in Hawaii, he got sick of being ignored by everyone but the basketball coach.  As soon as he could, took his but to the main land, started off in Cali, then finished up hitting the East Coast, finally settling in Chicago where a brotha has to be a brotha.  Before you knew it that dude was walking around the hood talking to people like he grew up on the South Side, eating rib tips, and eventually got him a big booty sista as confirmation of how you do the damn thing!  You see how he walked up to the podium after they killed Bin Laden?  You don’t “learn” that walk… you EARN that walk.  You earn it by putting Haters in their place.  He has Haters now, Mitt Romney, let the unemployment rate dip below 8% in the next couple of months, when people come to see Obama talk they are going to have to wait a couple of minutes from the time he gets to mic to when he says his first word.  Long enough for him to take off his hat, get a swig out his glass, and put on his sunglasses… so he can see what he’s saying!!

Remember how George Jefferson was walking during the opening credits of “The Jefferson’s”?  Remember how hard he was pimping as he escorted his woman into their new building up to their ‘deluxe penthouse in the sky-i-i’?  That was the first time George had ever walked like that, if you look really close you can see and lip read Weezy’s mouth you can see her saying “why in the fuck are you walking like that”?  He had no idea that was the first time he had ever walked like that.  People called it a ‘pimp’, that was not a ‘pimp walk’ that was George stepping on every Hater in his life.  With each step he crushed another Hater, “take that Archie Bunker”!

People focus on their ‘swag’ now; you cannot have swagga without having Haters.  When you see a 16-year-old kid walking around dressed like a fake member of Young Money, claiming that is their ‘swag’ they do not have it.  When you have Haters you do not need to dress a certain way, you just carry yourself a certain way.  You do not need skinny jeans that would just give the Hater another reason to hate on you.

You eventually realize there is nothing you can do about Haters, but appreciate their hate.  The Hater will talk about how your brand new, fresh off the lot, BMW 650i “ain’t all that”, then turn around and ask you for a ride to the ‘sto’.  A Hater will clown you about your new higher paying job, then send you an email at your work account asking if “y’all hiring”.  The Hater will disrespect your new home, tell you it is too small, that the neighborhood sucks, that they wouldn’t be caught dead over there, but they never miss a cookout and is the last one to leave.  The Hater looks at your watch and say “its a’ight”, then pop up 3 weeks later with a fake TAG Heuer and act like it the most expensive thing in the room.  Don’t get upset and challenge the Hater, you might beat the brakes off the Hater all the Hater will do is get up, wipe the blood from their lips and tell you his little brother and sister hit him harder than that when they were kids.

Let your Hater be your motivation, matter of fact any time you have spent too much time with your Hater go home and put on “Motivation” by Kelly Rowland.  Zone out for a few minutes and let your success show itself to you.

The saying ‘behind every successful man is a great woman’ is only partly true.  It should actually be gender neutral and more to the point “Behind every successful person, is a Hater… still hating on them”.  Keep doing you, you are fine and close to reaching your goals.  We need our Haters, so today let’s celebrate the Hater in our communities.  Call your Hater today and thank them for everything they haven’t done for you.  The only thing The Hater has ever done and will ever do is give birth to some hating ass kids. But if you do not know who The Hater is in your life… Hi Hater!

HAPPY BLACK HISTORY MONTH!!! Today We Salute Flava Aid

HAPPY BLACK HISTORY MONTH! Flava Aid, not KOOL AID. You did not notice when mom started buying cheaper meat or the off brand vanilla cream cookies or saltines instead of Ritz, but when you saw Flava Aid instead of Kool Aid you knew your family had some money problems.

That day you helped your mother with the groceries, you put the pork steaks instead of the usual pot roast in the freezer without a question.  Grabbed the store brand loaf of bread out the bag, not once did you question where the Wonder or Sara Lee bread is at.  But when you pulled out 50 packs of Flava Aid instead of the 20 packs of Kool Aid you became use to, you screamed out “Flava Aid… why you being so cheap?  What you be doing with your money?”  Learning two very important lessons at that moment, your mother has a serious left hook and don’t ever question her about how she spends her money.  The next thing that crosses your mind, after  you stop seeing stars, is that times is rough and how can this happen to your family.  You go to church, you don’t steal anything other than your neighbors cable and they are tapped into their neighbor’s cable so the original sin is on them anyway.

The Flava Aid revelation now has you more than interested in stock market ticker at the bottom of that one  boring channel you zoom by on your way to watch BET.  Unfortunately you don’t know what Kool Aid’s ticker symbol is, so your theory that the cost of Kool Aid has sky rocketed will remain unfounded.

“WHY DID MOMMY NOT INVEST IN KOOL AID???  We would be rich; I would be belly deep in purple Kool Aid right now if she did.”

That’s okay the president speaks tonight to the nation, he will surely address the rising cost of high quality drink mixes.  At 8:00 PM that night, you are in front of the television with an ice cold glass of water (you’re still not a hundred percent sure of that cheap stuff)…

“Mr. President, I could sure use your leadership right now.  War?  Crimes against humanity?  The right thing to do?  Man please… who elected this clown!  My mommy can’t afford my drank, deal with the issues man!  I can’t wait until I can vote.”

The next day you are at school, in English class your teacher asks you to draft a letter to someone you miss.  Your letter to the “Hey Kool Aid Man” is heartfelt, emotional… you get a “B” on it, but your teacher writes a referral to the school social worker about possible ‘issues’. You do not have time to talk answer questions from a professional about ‘uncles’ and point at puppets, you have to get to Chemistry class.  Dammit you will make your own Kool Aid!  How hard can it be?  Sugar, ground up Jolly Ranchers, and water… off you go!

Okay, that didn’t work out Kool Aid is not as easy as you thought it would be and while trying to ground up the Jolly Ranchers into a fine powdery substance, a piece broke off and hit that slow kid in his eye.

“Detention, I have to serve detention for trying to help financially challenged kids.  Oh well, Martin Luther King went to jail for his beliefs, an hour in the library for mine is worth it if it means a better life for all.”

Heck, half your friends are in detention so not so bad.  Plus, you all can kick it at your house after school, play Nintendo, and drink Kool… FUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGG.  Now you have 4 thirsty and judgmental ‘friends’ on their way to your house and they keep asking if you have red or green Kool Aid in the fridge.  You cannot stand privileged kids.  The fear that you feel creeping up on you as you near your house is only trumped by your outrage at the government for allowing it’s citizens to reach such levels of poverty.

You arrive at home with 4 ‘rich kids’ following you, your mom meets you at the door.  No company!!! Punishment???  Yes, I am on punishment!  Awesome.  I had to deal with a backhand left hand from mom and a possible concussion… but questioning where mom’s money was going has turned out to be an ego saving move.

“Bye… I gotta go clean my room and take out the garbage.  Thank God!”

Next day at school you figure the need to take interest in history class for the first time.  You want to know about the history of Kool Aid, which excites the class.  Everybody wants to talk about Kool Aid.  Who wouldn’t, until one kid asks the teacher if it is true that a man killed a bunch of people by poisoning their Kool Aid.  WHAT???  The teacher tells the class that the incident was at Jonestown and adds an interesting note about what they were drinking, “people for years have said it was Kool Aid they mixed up, actually it was Flava Aid”… you’re definitely not drinking that shit now.  And how stupid were those people to follow a broke cult.  If you ever join a cult they will have a lot of money and if you ever notice them switching out the Kool Aid for Flava Aid you know what’s going down and that the guy next to you is welcome to your glass.

Eventually, your mom pulls into the driveway with a small bag of Kool Aid and all is well again.  You’re not going to lose the house, you won’t have to spend your weekends walking around town with a stolen cart from the local Safeway collecting aluminum cans on the side of the road.  You can sleep peacefully again, knowing that your family has survived a serious financial crisis.  So on this 3rd day of Black History Month we salute Flava Aid, knock off drink mix, the drink of choice of deranged insecure cult leaders everywhere, and economic indicator for little Black kids.

Happy Black History Month!!! Today we salute The Snitch

Happy Black History Month! The Snitch is on every block talking real loud about the code of the streets while wearing a `Stop Snitching’ shirt. He is always telling you who he heard talked to the cops even though he is on speed dial at the precinct.  The Snitch will tell on anybody, it does not have to be a crime involved. 

 The Snitch will tell on a guy if he wants to sleep with his woman, the Snitch may know that he cannot sleep with that woman, but he will be damn’d if that guy keeps tappin’ the ass.  The Snitch does not even have to tell the truth, as long as they do not know what the truth IS, they will create a story that in their mind is the truth.  If the Snitch is jealous does not like that you have on some heels she wished she owned, those heels still have the tags tucked away and you plan on returning them tomorrow, wit’cha broke ass.

 Though the Snitch is a thorn in your side if it were not for them, the police would never arrest anyone in the Black community.  Most people in the Black community are afraid to talk to the police because they are afraid they will be found out by the criminals in their neighborhood and made a target or even worse labled a ‘snitch’.  The Snitch knows that there is no reason to be concerned about the criminals finding out, why?  Because the Snitch is a criminal, though he prefers to be called a ‘confidential informant’ or “CI”, he tells on other criminals so after they are arrested he can start committing the same crimes at the same places the guy he told on was.  Cops also let the Snitch get away with things based on how good his information is, so if the Snitch gives cops information on homicides and he keeps his crimes at or below selling dope, he can usually have a ‘get out jail free’ pass when arrested. 

Many Hip-Hop artists tell their fans they should not ‘snitch’, easy to say now that they do not live in neighborhoods, where someone telling on somebody could save a life… probably theirs (see Tupac).  Some rappers have made songs about ‘not snitching’, refused to coöperate with police conducting investigations, one rapper once said on CNN if he lived next door to a serial killer he would not tell the police… he would just move.  Unfortunately rappers are the biggest snitches ever.  When a rapper has ‘beef’ with another rapper the first thing they do is record a song that tells all the secrets they know about the rapper they do not like.  Can you imaging being snitched on through a post on Youtube?  How does the ‘violated’ rapper deal with being snitched on?  By snitching… if the other guy sent his snitching song to DJ Kay Slay, then the snitched on rapper goes on Funkmaster Flex’ show and dry-snitches.  No lyrics, no beat, no rhymes, no lubrication… sits in the studio talks to Flex in an interview format and tells Flex and the NYC metropolitan area (and eventually the entire Hip-Hop community) about the ‘short comings’ of the other rapper.  Honestly, rappers snitch on a higher level rarely achieved by street-level Snitches.  This level is called ‘keeping it real’ or as it is more commonly known ‘acting like a real bitch’.

 The Snitch’s favorite saying is ‘you can trust me’, usually stated after handing someone a joint while waiting for the unassuming person to tell on themselves.  Snitches do not record conversations or wear wires; no honorable Snitch would dare allow technology to do a job that they can do themselves.  The Snitch does not freely give away information, they could but they want you to work for it.  Think of the Snitch like the woman in your office that walks around the office telling everyone how much she loves the Lord and how she has to be at church every night of the week, but for a trip to Olive Garden on a Saturday night for bread sticks and all you can eat pasta you can have her speaking in tongues until she has to start getting ready for service the next morning.

Today’s snitch is a 3rd generation snitch, came from a snitching ass dad and snitching ass granddad, married a snitching ass mate… got together and made some snitching ass kids.  The Snitch has a picture of the Last Supper in their living room, with Judas sitting in the middle of the table finishing Jesus’ plate.  Crimes in the hood are solved by him for a carryout from Harold’s Chicken Shack on 35th and King Drive.  Happy Black History Month to the Snitch, we know you are someplace celebrating this month by telling people about the late great Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King… and his side ho.

Famous Snitches:

Kobe Bryant (told on 2 teammates, one to the cops the other before the playoffs)

Your little sister (told on you!)

President Jimmy Carter, admitted to lusting for a woman other than his wife.  NEVER EVEN HIT IT!!! (TOLD ON HIMSELF… DAAAAAAAAAAAMN)

Happy Black History Month!!! Today We Salute MC Shoot U

After the death of Tupac Shakur hip-hop lost its way, the Bling-Bling days, then the Mafioso days, and most recently the “How dare you pick up a microphone without having a parole officer” days.

One of the hottest rappers of the last 3 years has ‘kept it real’ without any question.  He has an arrest record that has to be kept on three different hard drives; he has spent so much time behind prison bars walking down the street on a bright sunny day is his biggest fear.  MC Shoot U has been signed to 8 different record deals before he ever officially released a song.  He lost 5 record deals because within days of agreeing with the labels he landed back in jail and they expired before he was released.  He lost 1 record deal because he liked the watch of one of the lawyers looking over his contract and said “fuck it” pulled out both of his guns and robbed the lawyer along with the other 13 people in the room.  The other two record deals were lost because the Feds raided during the signing and he never got to finish writing his name.

Like most present day rap artists, Shoot U’s buzz began on the streets before record labels even had a clue to his presence.  A couple of mix tapes sold out of the trunks of cars, a good YouTube following, and it is possible to become hip hop royalty.  Shoot U, born Nathaniel Webster Adams, got a following from his mix tape as well… yes that is mix tape singular as in one (1).  Shoot U refused to spend money to press CD’s so he made people listen to his songs at gun point and just stole the $5 dollars he would have sold his CD for from them after the tape popped off.

For The Source Magazine’s Unsigned Hype review of Shoot U they wrote:

“This is the realist artist coming today, no other rapper around today can record songs so rich in street culture and so terrifying that you forget he is actually holding the entire Source staff at gun point until we finish our positive review…  Help!”

Crimes committed by Shoot U became easy to solve, when a victim made a complaint and informed a detective they were robbed to a soundtrack the cops knew who their man was.  Clifton Jelks remembers the first time he heard MC Shoot U “2004, sometime in the Spring, I saw him free styling near the tracks… I had to try to make the next train to get to work.  He had a gun.  Now I like my music raw as anyone else, I remember hearing NWA and being afraid to go to Compton.  I remember seeing Mobb Deep in concert and having to fight my way out the place  to get to my car and I will never forget how hard I pee’d on myself when Shoot U held that gun to my head and rapped about it.”

Innocent bystanders came outside on the wrong day

8 at night on a Thursday

I’m gone spray

It’s they job to get outta MY way

Be it a murder or a robberay

Aint no reason for the crimes a nigga commit

Guns illegal Car Stolen

Except for the bullets

Aint nuthin I own legit

From the street anthem “You Shouldn’t Have Been Standing There”

Many rappers call themselves ‘street reporters’ and rap about crimes they saw happen or heard about.  MC Shoot U rapped about things he actually did.  Shoot U’s career ended because… well, he rapped about the things he actually did.  His only album was released the week he was arrested for what would eventually lead to a life sentence.  The album titled “I Killed Willie Banks… REALLY, I KILLED WILLIE BANKS” it produced one hit song “I Be Selling Dope At My Girlfriend’s Place (2247 S. Bishop)”.  Ironically, MC Shoot U was arrested at 2247 S. Bishop on Chicago’s South Side, police said they received a tip on his whereabouts.  The streets miss you Shoot U… ONE.