Happy Black History Month!!! Today We Salute… A 2-Piece With A Biscuit

The 2 piece with a biscuit sounds so simple, two pieces of chicken with a biscuit but it is so much more than that.  It can bring a smile to the faces of many Black people; it can also get you cut.  Touch the second piece of chicken in a 2-piece without it being offered to you and things will turn into a Daniel Day-Lewis movie… There will be blood.

If you are not familiar with a 2-piece with a biscuit let me tell the rules that go along with it, yes rules!  A 2-piece with a biscuit is a very serious thing in our community:

Rule #1:  Two wings do not make up a 2-piece.  Wings don’t even come that small in the hood, the fewest wings you can buy is three.  The only thing that has two wings on the block are birds.

Rule #2:  That better be a buttermilk biscuit!  I swear on my granddaddy’s grave if their ain’t no buttermilk in that biscuit I am going to drive by your establishment and throw it through your store window as you start to lockup for the night.

Rule #3:  If you give me a roll instead of a biscuit, first of all I better be at Church’s Chicken and second I have the right to choke you out in the middle of the street.

Rule #4:  It can’t be two legs unless I ask you for two legs.  If you give me two legs, without me requesting it, I will eat one of them while you fry me up the breast that was suppose to go with it in the first place… that is after you remove the leg I never asked for up out your ass!

Rule #5:  Acceptable 2-piece combinations; leg and thigh, leg and wing (but we will look at you like “that’s fucked up, man”, wing and thigh, a breast with any combination of other piece of chicken is choice.  However, if you give us two chicken breasts we will assume either the chicken is going bad and you hope that since I have two big pieces of chicken that will make me look past that funny smell coming from them or you are sleeping with my woman and figure the least you can do is give me some more chicken.

Rule #6:  NO COLESLAW!!!  This ain’t a 2-piece dinner man!  The 2-piece with a biscuit is ghetto finger food, we do not need to bring utensils into the transaction.

Rule #7:  The 2-piece with a biscuit should be ready within 3 minutes of ordering.  Long enough to bag it and slide it through that sliding plexiglass window, that protects you from being robbed and the occasional 1 in the morning shoot out.

The 2-piece with a biscuit is the perfect meal; as long as the meat is cooked all the way through we ain’t complaining about it.  Complaints start when you introduce more to the 2-piece with a biscuit.  Give a brotha a 3-piece dinner, you will hear a complaint.  Give him 3 chicken breasts, “I can’t eat all this”.  Give him 2 thighs and a leg, “cheap muhthafucka, all this damn dark meat… really?”  Get the chicken right, there will be something wrong with the sides. The cold side dish,   “I ain’t eating that damn potato salad… I don’t know who made it”.  Spaghetti as a side dish, “my momma told me, you don’t eat nobody’s spaghetti except yo’ mamas and your wife’s”.  Take away the biscuit and add bread, “this hard ass piece of bread, you can slide this shit across the floor and play hockey with it”!

Dr. Daniel Hale Williams an African American surgeon who performed the first heart surgery, on Chicago’s Southside, should have thanked the 2-piece with a biscuit.  The combination of the 2-piece drenched in mild sauce with a biscuit on the side made heart surgery necessary on the Southside to begin with… Way to go Harold’s Chicken Shack, way to go!  But this is about the chicken today, Dr. Williams, you have been celebrated for years and Harold’s Chicken I celebrate you at least 3 times a month!  With that said… to the one thing universally agreed upon in Black communities this is for you. We could not agree on 2Pac or BIG, Prince or Michael, Kobe or Lebron… Heck the 5 Heartbeats could not agree on Flash or Eddie Cain Jr. But from Harlem to Houston’s 5th Ward, Chicago to Charlotte, A-Town to South Central LA we agree on a 2-piece with a biscuit.  Let the church say… amen!